Are you stressed over living with your spouse under one roof though you are separated from one another? Obviously, it is natural to have such feelings during this time. Fortunately, there are some valuable and proven tips on how to separate from spouse while living together that you can follow.
A recent study shows that couples who need to live together after being separated rank as the 2nd painful and hectic thing for a human being.
From this study, you can only guess the pain behind it. Think about those people who need to face these things every day in their life. It is indeed one of the challenging situations in our life that certainly one will never want to face ever.
Well, this is one of the harsh truths of life where we need to surrender ourselves. As some things are not in our hands even if we don’t want those things to happen. That’s why the best thing is to move on by facing and accepting it. Believe me; you will feel much better and less pain than before.
5 Proven Tips on How to Separate from Spouse While Living Together
Even though it seems a normal issue, but in reality, it is a tough situation for every human being because you need to face him or her. As someone you loved and has spent together so many years, there will be tons of unforgettable memories. Suddenly if that close beloved person becomes a stranger, and you need to face him or her every day, imagine how you will feel!!!
Definitely, the slight imagination of such things is enough to give one goosebump. You will constantly find yourself having a flashback in your mind of the good times and bad times you spent together in this very house. Even a tiny piece of close item is enough to arouse past memories.
Although the whole situation is painful and awkward, it can still be lessened by doing some planning, like thinking of your ex-spouse as your roommate. Below is a list of survival tips that you can follow for living under the same roof although being separated:
Tip 1: Give each other some time and space
In most of the separation cases, one partner takes the decision at first. They either try to make the relation like before or get mutually separated if they both feel that getting separated is the best thing to do.
In cases where one is determined to get separated and has been thinking about it a long time, then certainly s/he will not want to turn back. The other half hearing the news will undoubtedly remain in shock if they have no clue about getting separated. Normally, the emotional level of both the person will not be the same.
Among both partners, one tends to be more emotional and breaks down than the other half. Especially the early days, they are the toughest as there will be an overload of mixed emotions at that time. No matter how much you try, you will find yourself getting more tangled.
That’s why it is better that you go with the flow if you decide to stay together after getting separated. So give each other some time and space to prepare yourself, as time is the best healer of all wounds.
For instance, the best way to give space is to stay in 2 different rooms. Once this new arrangement is set, it will ultimately form a boundary. Besides, even if you have an emotional breakdown, try to control and respect his or her personal space.
Tip 2: Bear your monthly costs
It is usual for couples to bear the monthly expenses together. In fact, in many cases, one spouse bears the entire expense. By monthly costs, we mean the total household cost from groceries to the house rents that is everything required for running the house properly.
Moreover, it is normal for couples to have their bank accounts together. In fact, it is a common norm for partners to have a joint account, whether be it for themselves or for their children.
That’s why if you both have decided to get separated, then the ideal decision is to bear one personal cost. Instead of depending on the other half like before. If both of you can follow it strictly, then you will be able to avoid several disputes. Because after getting separated, the other half isn’t liable for paying your expense anymore.
In case of having a joint account, you can either mutually discuss how much one wants to take or share equally. Therefore, if you decide to stay together, discuss what bills and costs to share to avoid further problems. The best way is to make a checklist and then follow it accordingly.
Tip 3: Make Timetables for Your Children
When a couple thinks of getting separated, the person who gets the most affected is their child (if any). In many cases, many children cannot bear their parent’s separation and thus goes either astray or suffer from mental issues.
For which, most couples decide to stay together mutually by signing an agreement (containing essential clauses and terms) by thinking about their child’s future. However, it is better to know the rights before legal separation to avoid future confusion. Because for a child, nothing is more important to them than staying together and getting both parents’ love.
In fact, one of the most crucial advantages of living together is that you both can sit together and plan schedules for your children. You can make a schedule of spending it together or separately spend it with your child if you feel awkward together.
Tip 4: Follow don’t fight strategy
Everyone has their share of opinions, and it is quite normal that the other person may not like your one always. But that doesn’t mean that you need to fight over it. It is better to let it go than to hold on to it.
In a study, it is found that one of the prime reasons behind getting separated is not being able to adjust, which ultimately leads to enormous fights every day.
Naturally, after getting separated, one finds it hard to put on a happy face with the other half, let alone living together. It is indeed very hard to stay with the same person with whom you have so many memories.
If you want to stay peacefully under the same roof, you mustn’t fight at all costs. Because fighting will worsen the situation, and it will be next to impossible to stay together with time.
A piece of advice: whenever you feel annoyed and think it is enough, just remember why you are still living together. You will get your answer instantly.
Hence it depends on you and your partner whether you want a peaceful environment or not. If you can strictly follow the don’t fight strategy, you will see that half of your problems are solved, and it will be easier to stay together.
Tip 5: Choose mutually when is the right time to have new partners
After getting separated, take time to make new ones, especially if you have kids. Otherwise, it might affect your child. Naturally, they will not like the idea of seeing their parents instantly with new persons.
Until everything is sorted out between both of you regarding the separation agreement, it is better not to make new partners. For that time being, it is best to take it slow. Moreover, except for kids, take some time to heal and rediscover yourself before moving on.
Therefore, these are the top 5 tips you can follow for living with your spouse under the same roof after getting separated.
The Bottom Line
Although it is second to impossible to stay with someone who was once your most beloved and close person, still due to some reasons, we need to take such drastic steps.
Even though the mere thought of separation and staying together after separating can be nerve-racking, but what needs to be done has to be done whether you like it not. Knowing the tips on how to do it beforehand can definitely ease up the process for you and your partner.
Now that you know the 5 proven tips on how to separate from spouse while living together follow them as instructed. Hopefully, you will not regret it and thus will find it easier to stay together. Lastly, stay happy!!!